If you have read my about page (no, it’s not a shameless plug), you would have known that I started blogging since the later part of 2001. I could call myself a rather religious blogger initially, having painstakingly followed many people’s footsteps to document their lives the same way I did and I had a great deal of blog friends whom I’ve never met and why should it matter? Sometimes taking the privacy out of blogosphere kills the joy you had in reveling in the life of perfect strangers even those you love to hate. For example, you have disliked this female blogger and all she represents for the longest time and viola! The next thing you know, you actually met her at a party and she has proven to be nice unlike her undesirable online persona and it can be rather disappointing. In short, it leaves a narrow room for imagination.
Of course, there were times when Curiosity overwhelms Sensibility and you find yourself trotting into a cafe for a coffee session with a few of your faithful readers and you of theirs.
Merry Traveller: Where are you seated? I’m at Starbucks already.
Blogger A: Oh I am wearing a blue shirt with spectacles and Blogger B is wearing a white shirt and jeans.
And you thought the description would vaguely suffice only to turn and look around a cafe full of blue and white shirts and jeans before you caught sight of two enthusiastic, waving hands clothed by .. well … white and blue. As I made my way towards the people whose lives I’ve known so initimately but not themselves, I felt guilty admitting that I harboured an impulse to turn around and run. Of course, I could never be that rude and then what ensued were moments of initial awkwardness, shy smiles, what-the-fuck-am-I-doing looks and stumped speeches.
Merry Traveller: Hey! Uh, erm, finally we meet and you look like this …
Merry Traveller: Uh I mean not in the bad way definitely but I’ve never thought you’ll look like this …
Merry Traveller: And wow, blue, it’s a common favourite colour. No, I mean you guys look great in blue. I don’t like blue very much though.
Merry Traveller: No what I really mean is that you guys have great blogs, really enjoyed reading your entries and .. uhm the fantastic blue layouts. They are so … organized.
And words go free-flowing even though they may not sound quite the same way you meant to. Anything to mask the sense of anxiety you feel. It is easy to experience nervousness especially when you meet a respected blogger or your favourite blogger you’ve never missed a post. I do not know which is worse though, saying way too much that doesn’t make sense and spell ‘a-w-e’ or keeping totally quiet, clueless on how to proceed but luckily enough for me, I warm up after a while and everything will go right again.
Between June 2001 and now is a difference of 8 years. I cannot tell you how many people I’ve met (I’m not totally anti-social, just a little) but there are very few that I kept in touch with since the only linkage between me and most of the others was a link on the blog or an add to bloglines but other than that, we thrive in different professions, we have dissimilar clothing preference, he likes savory and I like sweet, he enjoys coffee and I live with tea, though we drank beer but he prefers Heineken and I like my Hoegaarden and despite six degrees of separation, we still have no mutual friends.
Simply, we are as different as Night and Day.
And so years passed and now that I am back blogging, not as zealous as before since there are much less things I had to say without feeling repetitive. As I visited some old blogs I used to follow, it is not hard to be surprised at some of the changes that had taken place while I went missing on myself. I see blog posts being replaced with tweets as newer technological utilities made it possible to convey our thoughts in a different manner, I see inserts of advertorials pitched snugly between blog posts full of photographs, I see upholders of Nuffnang thanking them for every single event they have attended (I had to google for Nuffnang, I had no idea at all), I see only fragments of their older selves as new considerations take priority over their current lives. Mr. Miyagi is now married with a kid, Little Miss Drinkalot no longer blogs about alcohol intake (not in the recent posts at least), La Idler is not longer enjoying any idle days …
At the end of the day, I am left wondering – How have I changed?
Did I just expire?
